rubbish

weeeeell.. few days ago, my friend facetime-d me from another country.

and now, i just couldn't stop thinking how wonderful it could be if someone, out there, who's living in another country, is my special one. 

awwhhhh so coool! and awesome! their culture differences, their social differences, all their mentality differences, (positive conducts only, mind you.) i would really love to experience that!

and then few years later, he's gonna come back home with a kid. or worse, a wife. lepastu i would cry like hell, and then i pulak lari ke luar negara. omg epic sungguh drama bersirimu. Lol

ps: how wonderful it would be if someone cool is waiting for you. (MY definition of 'cool', not yours, of course)  fuh fuh. too much too ask, no?

pps: was watching horror movie Mama when suddenly rain poured in (and still) .mencik ah astro ishh potong stim.

missing

is it illegal if you miss someone physically? i mean, not sexually. like, presence. yeah, just that.

that presence lingers on me now.

*damnit stop quoting Fergie's*

puddycattttt

i saw a cat the other day. now i am not sure anymore. whether i fall for the cat, or the owner….. heheheheh

who is the one that says, "to start a frikking new chapter, you just have to let go."

well man, you lied. or wrong.

why is that?

bcs i have been starting new chapters without even closing the previous.

the suffer.

shit.

4 out of 5 flips confession.

again, maybe God is saving me fr all the embarassment. 

say no to H!

Pagi ni aku baru terfikir.

I am SO NOT PREPARED. 

to have my Muka baru bangun, gigi tak gosok, mata sepet, rambut serabai, my bunyi kentut, the smell of it, my kaki berbulu, my berak smell, my Malas, all my pet peeves, to be exposed to a man called husband.

or even the other party's.

ok now then please abstain yourself from the word "marriage". AND bakal husband . blekh.

masa untuk fikiran meliar

I don't have time to think about hearts and feelings and all these fcking issues. you can taught your mind to think in whatever way you want. 

but at the end of the day, you can't choose whatever way you're feeling of things. you just couldn't help it. helpless. 

to hell with realistic approach. 

to hell with "the most suitable method to solve this problem is... " 

sometimes you are just tired

Of being positive

you were being so positive that you actually masks the negative feeling.

Of being logic. and realistic.

if logic is that good,

life won't be as fcked up as it is.

sometimes you just know it, 

that you're fcked up.

to say is a thing. but to really mean it, is another thing altogether.

no?

nonetheless, i appreciate the good intention which bred the sayings and I thank you for that.
Alah, most of the times, humans utter things they do not understand just because they feel the need to say it at that paticular time. Words assure. Itu yang pasti.

humans

to hell with perfect theories and the most suitable and even the most relevant ways to do things.

people are not that perfect to feel things they SUPPOSE to feel. and SUPPOSE to do.

heck, humans are not even that relevant.

2 jan awal pagi mak aku call.

"Kakak, buat apa tu? Cari tiket flight cepat."

Aku yang mamai mamai terus bulat mata. "Ha?! Okay!"

Scroll situ sini. Okey tiket pukul 2 paling cepat. Pia offer nak hantar (tq pia ilepchu!)

Before pergi airport, Yazid datang hantar hadiah (baju Uniqlo warna electric blue so cool!), aku naik atas budak rumah buat instant surprise pakai donut malam tadi. Lols. Qeela bagi hadiah cool. Heheheh thanks babe! Practical sgt benda tu! 

And to the airport we go.

Makan kat Texas Chicken sbb breakfast pun xsempat hahah. 

Lepas makan, Pia hantar sampai gate je la. Hehe. Rupa rupanya boleh print situ ja cis. Selama ni aku kelam kabut nak print rupanya ada self print machine hahaha -.-

hey.

hey friend, 

now that you have more and better friends, I wish you happiness.

it's like friendship sparkles you.

and I'm happy to see that for a person who used to dread not having friends. yeah i know what I said. although I am not part of it. it's okay.

I'm glad you find them.

now I hope it will find no ending. 

bcs sometimes, love shines you out.

you shine. that's enough.

:)

Kan?

Sometimes, knowing what is right is not enough, knowing what is appropriate is.

Puddy cat.

I want a cat, that wants me back.

:(

Right or wrong or none at all?

We often know what's right and what's wrong. 

Sometimes we just want to know the alternatives available.

Most of the times, people tend to resort for the wrong. 

Why?

Because humans need to learn on their own. 

Because that's life.

To make wrong a right.

Right?

P/s: ok dude. Kau boleh dah kot habiskan chapter Adjudication tu.

Which friend character are you?

"Some talk to you in their free time, and some free their time to talk to you.“ 

What type of friends do you surround yourself with?

Or, what type of friend are you?

Or even, how are you behaving to the ones you called your close friends?

(Quote was from the net.)

Wth roommate??!

I dont know why my roommate ticks me off so much. 

Maybe because she acts like detective in knowing wherever i go. Not that i dont tell anyone wherever I'm going. Just that i dont think she has the right to know. and if i want her to know, i would already tell her...... tak faham ke adoi. plus, we just live with each other, for eff's sake!

I bet she scrutinised all stuff i owned whenever i'm not around. Lols.

UPDATE: she lent me money when I needed urgently. all is well.

Chapters.

I just hope i did the best resolution to resolute my past. One of the chapters. To let go. 

Won’t the page get torn if i clung on too long on it?

Let go, nadia. Learn to let go.

Learn to accept.

That he's just not that into you. Anymore.

And it's kinda sad.

People who used to want you, 

Don't want you anymore.

Lazy much.

I always find myself agree to whatever things that people experienced, yet i kept silent about it. 

Too lazy to agree. Ugh.

I seem to cannot let go of past. 

what am i becoming, dear God?