what if I

Leave everything here and start afresh somewhere?

People will forget and move on.

And things should be better, don't you think?

But what if it doesn't?

What if tomorrow won't be better than today?

And I won't be young forever. That's for sure.

And it's better to be tired than to be broke.

And I don't want my mom to realise that she raised a quitter

I am bearing with the fact that I'd rather struggle tring to learn rather than struggling from being a stupid.

What if I really end it here right now?

No no. Life has given me wonderful things. My mom, my grandmother, my sisters, my bro, you.

You made me realise that I'm worth something

Maybe with the right person I would be.

But not with the wrong person. You won't ever feel enough.

Until this moment I'm embracing all our moments together. I might not be the one for you, but you were the one for me. At least for those moments which has passed.

I wish I could relive our moments. I wish I could go back to our moments. Not to change them, but to relive it again and again. 

But that would just be nonsense, doesn't it?

Living in past.

And what matter is now.

Oh how I need to share all my worries.

Oh how I wish we could've shared our worries together.

But we couldn't.

And I don't think we should.

We should just probably live to each of our own lives.

If only you knew how much you mean to me

If only I could tell you how much you mean to me

But I shouldn't.

If only...

I wish I could grow old with you.

Why do I keep wishing impossible things

I really wish I could stop crying right now